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My name is Kevin, and I just moved back to North Carolina after a year hiatus. West Asheville is now home to me, my two dogs and the worst dating scene since the bubonic plague. No one said dating is easy. Most of us single folks are in uncharted territory.
My age: I am 20
Ethnic: I'm thai
Who do I prefer: Guy
Tint of my eyes: I’ve got huge hazel eyes
My favourite drink: Cider
In other words, if you want someone who has deep religious beliefs, don't go to a bar. I talk.
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Bar hopping may be fun with friends, but in middle age, not likely to turn up serious candidates. I'm open to suggestions here, folks. Wouldn't give us forks. OK, so that's not a plan for everyone. How's that? Dating sites or apps ranging from Match.
America, made out of many
One single Asheville lady in this age group suggested no matter the venue, men just need to step up and, well, be men. So, here's my question: Where do I meet a woman of my age for a relationship in Asheville?
She's not likely to be there. It's a fun crowd. OK, I posted the question on my Facebook to solicit input, and boy did I get some, including some replies that were actually useful.
My answer: Um, is this guy asking me to start a dating service, because that's what I'm hearing? I've volunteered in the past with the Downtown Asheville Association and gone to their end of the year parties.
Or, you could take the advice of noted local Republican Chad Nesbitt, probably the least shy human on earth. I'm hoping there's a single resource out there so I don't have to search a lot of different places. Petersen moved here in her 20s and met her husband when she tried out for a play.
Most of them lost their spouse due to death and they are single. All right, folks, Dr. Lovemaster is closing the office for the day This is the opinion of John Boyle.
OK, what the heck: Welcome to Flabbyandfifty. I've asked everyone I know and then some how to meet a single, sane man in Asheville with hair and teeth and no one ever knows a soul. Even though he's married, his advice also made me laugh. Remember, ask for Chad's granddad!
I did get a lot of thoughtful, more serious replies, although no one had the all-powerful one-stop-shopping idea this guy was looking for. There is a bar up there and they have a lot of functions.
That was a common theme. My granddad is the bartender and the place is slammed with over fifties and sixties people. But still, as a dedicated public servant, I tried to get answers. In 18 months, I have not had one man say hello, offer me a drink, ask me out. Question: "I'm sitting across from a gentleman in his 50s, as am I, and we're stymied about meeting mature women. I thought it was pretty good advice, until an old friend, Bill Atkinson, chimed in with this nugget: "I thought most somethings were looking for something more in their 20s. Tell them to hang out by the avocados Beeman offered this advice: "I would think the same advice I gave my something son would also apply here: Go to places where you will meet the kind of woman you want to spend time with.
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And so on, and so forth. Hit up funerals. Answer Man: Where can somethings find love in Asheville?
I've got to give these fellas some hope, though, so here's a comment from my former fellow columnist Susan Reinhardt: "I met my husband in the Nut Hut. Better'n Match. On second thought, that's probably too personal a name.
As Honor Moor, a married Asheville resident who started the Asheville Affiliates in as a place for young business folks to socialize, put it, "There is not an easy-peasy one stop shop. I have to believe that these healthy grocery stores might work for those wishing to find a healthy partner in life!
Another single lady suggested getting involved in groups that match your interests.
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If you want someone who likes to go to football games, don't go to the library looking for someone. Another former colleague, Thomas Fraser, who is single but no longer lives in Asheville, also made me laugh out loud. Facebook Twitter. They will increase in frequency.
Justkibbutz allows "mombassadors" to set up their children on dates.
To submit a question, contact him at or jboyle citizen-times. I'll summarize all these comments thusly: Get involved in groups, activities and causes you believe in and enjoy, make yourself available to others — and be a little assertive! He played Marla Milling has been on the dating scene as a single lady for awhile now, and she says it's not quite as simple as getting out and doing what you love.
Married men will often flirt, but hey, I'm not looking for an affair at ALL. So, I know the question was how the gentleman in your post could meet someone in Asheville? I mingle. Everybody is happy! I really don't know.
John Boyle jboyle citizen-times. Real answer: As I'm a happily married something-year-old man with the dating skills of a water buffalo, I'm not sure why this guy asked me this question. I go out and socialize.
Middle-aged men need to act like men.
Our new persons
So without further ado, I present the 5 men you will sleep with before you leave Asheville.
Jason Sandford is a reporter, writer, blogger and photographer interested in all things Asheville.
Hoping to make friends but not really knowing my way around, I aimlessly wandered downtown at dusk, vaguely intending to just waltz into bars and maybe make a new acquaintance or two.